For the last 20 years I have spent the week after Christmas at local high school basketball tournaments and this year was no different. Only this year, for the first time ever, I began to feel a little old and I liked it. It wasn’t just one thing, but several things I saw over the past week that made me glad I wasn’t a teenager anymore.
Sure, I looked like a buffoon when I was in high school, rolling up the sleeves on my short sleeve shirts (like I had any muscles to show off) and keeping the top three buttons on my long sleeve shirt unbuttoned so I could show off my white T-shirt underneath. But all that pales in comparison to what some of the teenagers are wearing today.
Case in point. I was walking in to the gym one afternoon and saw a group of high school girls wearing sunglasses. Only these weren’t any ordinary sunglasses. No these sunglasses looked like the gigantic sunglasses we used to try on in the dime store as kids to make our friends laugh. Only now these ladies are wearing them because they think they are fashionable. Not only are they not fashionable but they also seem to be a nuisance. Unlike normal sunglasses that young ladies can easily slip into their purses, these huge sunglasses apparently won’t fit. Instead the girls have to keep them on top of their head which makes them look like they are wearing two little beanies. Real fashionable huh? Of course, I also learned that I am not only getting old but oblivious to the cold also. Here I am in a light jacket and jeans and a pair of tennis shoes but these teens were wearing furry boots. Yes, furry boots. It looked like they were ready for an Alaskan snowstorm, only it was 50 degrees.
If that doesn’t look ridiculous enough, the boots aren’t just worn, they are displayed. Yes, these want to-be fashion statements stick their jeans into their boots to better show them off. In a couple cases I even saw girls wearing shorts with these fuzzy boots. Myself, I never really wanted to dress to like an Eskimo, but apparently that is the new craze among girls. Unfortunately, it isn’t just the girls who have adults everywhere laughing at them because somewhere along the way, we as adults forgot to show the boys how to wear their caps. When I grew up, my dad showed me that when you wear a baseball cap, the bill goes toward the front He said this was to shade my face from the sun and naive me, I believed him.
Today though, kids wear their caps cockeyed or backward, every way but the correct way. I saw one kid with hr hat on cockeyed and thinking I was doing a good thing, told him it was on a little sideways. He looked at ME like I was the idiot. Could he not see himself in the mirror? The guy next to me whispered that kids today think that is “cool.” I think it is kind of funny that teens are always wanting to be treated like adults but are dressing like cartoon characters. I mean wouldn’t it be a little tough hearing Johnny Toocool say “… but I’m not a kid anymore,” while wearing his hat cockeyed?
Since you can’t tell a teenager something, I think we should try to be cool too. Ladies go ahead and buy the oversized sunglasses so you can look like a bumble bee and don’t forget the Eskimo boots, but be sure to wear them outside of your jeans. And guys, let’s turn our hats cockeyed because remember, it’s the thing to do.